For Singles & Couples
THE BIGGEST MISTAKE that couples make is failing to talk about their sex life. So we speak of it freely together here in a safe, comfortable, trusting environment where the conversation can be productive. It is important to feel good about your sexuality and to optimize your sexual health.
Married couples are five times more likely to have sex two to three times per week than are singles, a Kinsey sex study shows (2010). They also get better at it and have more pleasure out of it. So see, you can become an expert! John Gottman, a master marital therapist in the field states where men are involved in housework and child care, their partners see them as sexy, and indeed have more sex than couples in which the men are chore free.
However, some couples endure for years without a fulfilling sex life and accept that as the norm in their busy, parallel lives. A sexless marriage is not what people dream of or look forward to – it’s what they end up with. Don’t settle. It’s not necessary to live like roommates. It is true that everyone has a different libido. Sexual desire and interest in frequency range from one end of the spectrum to the other. Especially today, there are so many options available, no matter which time in the life cycle you are in, or whether you deal with male or female sexual dysfunction concerns, some help is available and everything is negotiable.
Then there is the issue of INFIDELITY. Yes, it happens, and it is one of the most emotionally painful, traumatic experiences possible. Yet I am impressed with the resiliency of more and more couples who are choosing to recover and learn what they need to do to make their marriages better. You CAN recover from an affair…Divorce is not always the best answer.
Sex is a very complex entity. Especially if you prefer to define it as MAKING LOVE. Big difference. Huge. Decide you are worth all that you want it to be! There is help and hope for your sexual needs and desires. All you have to do is ask. Request a discreet, completely private and confidential session with Dr. Crist and change your life, whether you are single or in a committed relationship. You’ll be glad you did.
How satisfied are you with your sex life?
Do you know what your partner considers erotic, or do you assume to know? Do you expect perfection of your partner? Yourself?
(Perfection varies by definition from partner to partner)
There is not a more intimate time or space. Delicate. Tender. Vulnerable. Capable of great injury if not treated carefully. Most would argue that emotional intimacy precede physical intimacy for the optimum lovemaking experience. I had the great honor of seeing Dr. Ruth at the Kravis Center in West Palm Beach on January 5, 2017. Anyone over 45 years of age knows of her. She was the first person to speak openly and candidly about sex on a radio show many years ago, which quickly became a national radio show and catapulted her to international fame as a sex expert. In paraphrasing Dr. Ruth, she offered two examples which I’ll share with you:
- A woman has to give herself permission to have an orgasm. So fantasize if you want.
- You can have a whole football team in your head if you want to.
- A man’s penis can never compete with the vibrations of a vibrator, so use it!
Her levity makes talking about sex easier, so I say use that! In my office, both partners will be honored and respected as we discuss sexual matters. We all have a desire to love and be loved. There are many precursors that can interfere. Making love is an important part of a healthy, mature, romantic love relationship. Let’s make it as enjoyable as possible.